Conception

August 27, 2013

( Story: star-dust+ Egg+Sperm= the Human Experience: ENJoy)

It began as a long corridor, painted with nine moving figures, almost like, a welcoming party, only they were not bent on saying hello, rather, they were occupied, with focused intoxication in detailing my voids with purposeful movement.

As I made my way down an expanding hall, a room found me.

It was pale, still and wafer-thin with time.  Upon greeting,  painlessly and with no hesitation, it peeled back it’s skin.

Buried inside the layers of wall was half of a room. The other half, well it was only to be reached by climbing up a ladder propped against a bright light.

Whereupon I stood, my face met the celestial breath of night and the warmth of an eclipsing light.  Bewitched the darkness perambulated beneath my scintillated lids.

Galvanized, I stood feeling the inception of behemoth black while it drowned wanting lids with star dust and polished pebbles.

Fire and earth cavorted forming an allegory of love crashed into the soul of a blind guest. I had become rebellious star-dust born solely to answer to the call of my own crux.

Behold my first vision, spiraling stairs, cascading upwards into a place where mine eyes could not reach.

  Transfixed I was until directed to go forward.

As I climbed the stairs I felt myself, like a train barreling down an unknown tunnel, being thwarted past perceptibility and time.

As I reached the top I strangely felt bits of wet clay squelching between my toes.

It wasn’t until I was still, and caught and held one silent breath that I realized that in order to become whole I needed to dive in.

So I ran. With drunken madness, I traveled into the belly of a salivating creature; it eager to envelop me in its womb, and I eager to be  cloaked.

The very moment I was consumed, was the very moment I was released into the chasm of euphoric realization, and I did not hold back.

Unbeknownst to me, in that exact moment, I shared a pathway with an unknown figure, and he too had been thwarted, leaped and  consumed.

We met in rushing waters. Inseparable, from then forward, conjoined we sailed.

Within the time-span of nine heart beats we absorbed

storming clouds and riveted sunsets.

We were synergistic in our combustion; together creating a polychromatic being.

Through the bombastic force that at times shifts the earth, two beings, meshed as one, arose through a tiny fissure.

This being was miraculous, perfection unfurled. It’s first steps although slow, defied all the laws of gravity; it was pure possibility wrapped in earth.

It’s eyes, a cloudy treasure chest, binding the secrets of its soul.

And it’s armor, ingeniously infused with electric circuits, charging for movements to come.

At first breath it unfolded, followed by a revolving stretch.

This being, spun by dream weavers, had inside its belly a cup of un-spilt passion, bequeathed  by star-dust and fastened by the undivided attention of a ready soul.

Sword drawn and consciousness ready, it smiled with its face pressed against the world. And with dreams in heart and painted reality at bay, it had only one thing  in reply to the challenges it was soon to face, “En garde.”

CONCEPTION

It began as a long corridor, painted with nine moving figures, almost like, a welcoming party, only they were not bent on saying hello, rather they were occupied, with focused intoxication, in detailing my voids with purposeful movement.
As I made my way down an expanding hall, a room found me.
It was pale, still and wafer-thin with time.  Upon greeting,  painlessly and with no hesitation, it peeled back it’s skin.
And inside the walls was half of a room. The other half, well it was only to be reached by climbing up a ladder propped against a bright light.
Whereupon I stood, my face met the celestial breath of night and the warmth of an eclipsing light.  Bewitched the darkness perambulated beneath my scintillated lids.
Galvanized, I stood feeling the inception of behemoth black while it drowned wanting lids with star dust and polished pebbles.
Fire and earth cavorted forming an allegory of love crashed into the soul of a blind guest. I had become rebellious stardust born solely to answer to the call of my own crux.
Behold my first vision, spiraling stairs, cascading upwards into a place where my eyes could not reach.
Transfixed I was until directed to go forward.
As I climbed the stairs I felt myself, like a train barreling down an unknown tunnel, being thwarted past perceptibility and time.
As I reached the top I strangely felt bits of wet clay squelching between my toes.
It wasn’t until I was still, and caught and held one silent breath that I realized that in order to become whole I needed to dive in.
So I ran. With drunken madness, I traveled into the belly of a salivating creature; it eager to envelop me in its womb, and I eager to be found.
The very moment I was consumed, was the very moment I was released into the chasm of euphoric realization, and I did not hold back.
Unbeknownst to me, in that exact moment, I shared a pathway with an unknown figure, and he too had been thwarted, leaped and  consumed.
We met in rushing waters. Inseparable, from then forward, conjoined we sailed.
Within the time-span of nine heart beats we absorbed
storming clouds and riveted sunsets.
We were synergistic in our combustion; together creating a polychromatic being.
Through the bombastic force that at times shifts the earth, two beings, meshed as one, arose through a tini fissure.
This being was miraculous, perfection unfurled. It’s first steps although slow, defied all the laws of gravity; it was pure possibility wrapped in earth.
It’s eyes, a cloudy treasure chest, binding the secrets of its soul.
And it’s armor, ingeniously infused with electric circuits, charging for movements to come.
At first breath it unfolded, followed by a revolving stretch.
This being, spun by dream weavers, had inside its belly a cup of un-spilt passion, bequeathed  by star dust and fastened by the undivided attention of a ready soul.
Sword drawn and consciousness ready, it smiled with its face pressed against the world. And with dreams in heart and painted reality at bay, it had only one thing  in reply to the challenges it was soon to face, ”En garde.”

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 To bring New Ideas/ Feelings and Ignite Latent Passions

 

1.VOLUNTEER– I realize that sometimes one may think it is a hassle to go out of your way to volunteer but maybe you just have not found a group or a topic that you care about. Check out this website and browse through the list of organizations and find one that sparks your interest.  Make a goal of at least once a month you spend a full day going out of your way for someone who needs help. It is in giving to others that we not only make the world better, but we open ourselves up to attracting happier things into our lives.

 http://www.transitionsabroad.com/listings/work/volunteer/volunteerwebsites.shtml

2.READ SELF-HELP BOOK– Reading a self- help book doesn’t mean there is something wrong with you. It is the same equivalent to working out , and it enables you to fine- tune your emotions and mind so that you are on a constant progression of self-betterment.   It doesn’t matter what religion or belief system you are be open- minded and suspend judgment so that you can enable yourself to grow. Questioning things is the only way you will derive answers that will expand your current scope of knowledge and bring you closer to the truth about you and your place in the Universe.

 http://www.amazon.com/Self-Help-Health-Mind-Body-Books/b?ie=UTF8&node=4736

3.PICK ONE BIG BAD HABIT AND CHANGE IT– Design a game plan on how you are not going to do it anymore.  Don’t just say you won’t do it or you will “try” but write something down and design it in such a way that you are held accountable. Write down everything about that habit and how it affects your life and come up with ideas to counter-attack it.  Pick a habit that you know brings more negativity to your life than good. It can range from being apathetic, condescending, inconsistent, always late, negative, intolerant, lazy, over reacting, complaining too much, manner-less, inconsiderate, not eating right,  not taking care of your body, making fun of others, not believing In yourself, being hard on yourself, not working hard, etc.

http://www.ehow.com/how_4549359_break-bad-habits.html

 4.CREATE VISUAL BOARD/VIDEO- Everything you want to happen in the immediate or far future, put it somewhere in plain sight.  Get images or words that aid in the projection of a vision of what you want to attract in your life. Only put positive images and words up that reinforce, remind or create feelings of goodness, happiness, fulfillment, kindness, balance, and love.

http://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Vision-Board

5.ENROLL IN A CLUB OR CLASS– Start or continue your education. If there’s a subject you wish you knew more of, if you want to change your career, if you want to finnish college but don’t have time to take a full- load, take the first step, save up and enroll in one class at any school in your area.

 https://www.uclaextension.edu/r/default.aspx

6.START a PROJECT- Begin a side project in a subject that you really are good at or like and create a time line of completion and find at least five places you will submit your project into or share it with.

7.TEACH ENGLISH ABROAD– One of the best ways to expand your mind and heart is by traveling.

 http://www.soyouwanna.com/soyouwanna-teach-english-abroad-1099.html

8.JOIN A WORKOUT CLUB or SPORTS TEAM– Whether you just want to get in shape or meet people with like interest while being active, you should joint a sports club or team. It’s a great way to not only get in shape, but meet people, and be physically engaged in activity and or competition.

9.FACE YOUR FEAR– We all have fears, some big some small. Pick one, and face it. For instance I am terrified of needles. This is one of the biggest things I have not progressed since a child. I have the same reaction a little kid does to needles. So this year I have decided I don’t want my doctor visits to be as odd as they have been, well that and I don’t think it’s normal or healthy to be THAT afraid of anything. I think we find with fears it is more in our imagination than the reality of the situation or thing that we actually fear. So I’m picking needles what’s your fear?

http://www.positivityblog.com/index.php/2008/10/03/how-to-overcome-your-fear-7-tips-from-the-last-2200-years/

10. Smile/Laugh more-  Children laugh on average 300 times a day compared to adults only laughing 15 times a day. I’m not saying become like the Joker and scrape a permanent smile into your face. But maybe not take life so serious all the time, don’t furrow your brow as much, and try to smile and be thankful for the little things. Find the humor in the ridiculous and re-discover some of your childlike playfulness.

HAPPY 2011!

 I lurve the New Years because it’s a great pretext to “start over” and you have the momentum of everyone else doing it with you.  Here’s to all of us working hard, dreaming big and believing that with great faith, love , a kind heart and persistence anything and everything is possible.

Here’s to us!

I don’t really watch T.V much, but when I do I’m surprised to see how so many of the people on it are  in  romantic relationships when they don’t have  a healthy relationship with themselves.

It’s not just the T.V world, I see it in the people I meet and in some of the friends I have.  I have friends who have been serial dating since they were 15-year-old and have yet to be in a healthy relationship. And every time one of their relationships ends, they always seem to find fault in the partner they were with or even love itself, never once stopping to think that maybe the problem is cemented in them.

What do these un-healthy people look like? They have low-self value, live masochistic lifestyles, ego driven, lack of identity, sex or body driven self-worth, a  narcissistic personality, selfish, materialistic, jaded, bitter, jealous, negative, cowardly and a victim mentality (boo ho for me all the time). (Of course there are more traits than these, but for now this will do)

This is how I see it, metaphorically.

When we are born, our parents build us a house, and in that house there are things we like and don’t like. For all of us there are healthy and unhealthy elements to it, that as we grow can become a part of what we think or feel is natural or unnatural about the world.

As we get into our teens, we start grabbing control of our individuality and decide to decorate our rooms; our first step into coming into our own, into expressing our inner needs and wants. Along the way, depending on how many relationships (friendships and lovers) we engage in, the room fluctuates between neat and messy.

As for the rest of the house, depending on the type of family you have, it can become continuously upgraded; catering towards your growth, continuously downgraded; stunting your growth, or somewhere tittering in-between whereupon growth comes in stints of a lot, a little, to none at all.

Once you go to college or reach about the age of 17-18 and are in the next stage of your life, it is your duty to rebuild, redecorate, refurnish.  Depending on your childhood you may not need to change very much. If your family built you a stable foundation that is connecting you to happiness, love and success than maybe you just need to re-decorate and not re-build. If your family, created a house with a weak base than it is your job to take the time to tear down and build a better one.

You will never find true love and happiness if you don’t work to fix yourself, your issues from childhood, and any other issues that come along the way .

When you date someone you bring them into your house of clutter or neatness, depending on the amount of self-help you have done. Depending on how long they are there, some just alter a corner of your room, others the entire room, and some the entire house.   So many of the people I know just pack their last fling, or boyfriend/girlfriend in a box, closet, or in a room, shut the door and pretend they don’t exist because they’re not in sight. If you don’t take the time to unpack, grieve, and clear up the remains of your past relationships, you are only weakening your foundation for personal and relationship growth.

The story of the Three Little Pigs provides a great example of the dangers of not building a “home” (life) with a proper foundation and roof. In the book, ‘The Uses of Enchantment, The Meaning and Importance of Fairy Tales, author, Bruno Bettelheim, an Austrian born child psychologist and writer, touches on the matter in a meaningful piece called ‘Pleasure Principle versus Reality Principle.’  The following is an excerpt from his book.

 “The littlest pig built his house with the least care out of straw; the second used sticks; both throw their shelters together as quickly and effortlessly as they can, so they can play for the rest of the day. Living in accordance with the pleasure principle, the younger pigs seek immediate gratification, without a thought for the future and the dangers of reality, although the middle pig shows some growth in trying to build a somewhat more substantial house than the youngest.

Only the third and oldest pig has learned to behave in accordance with the reality principle: he is able to postpone his desire to play, and instead acts in line with his ability to foresee what may happen in the future. He is even able to predict correctly the behavior of the wolf- the enemy, or stranger within, which tries to seduce and trap us; and therefore the third pig is able to defeat powers both strongest and more ferocious than he is. The wild and destructive wolf stands for all asocial, unconscious, devouring powers against which one must learn to protect oneself, and which one can defeat through the strength of one’s ego.  The story of the three pigs suggests a transformation in which much pleasure is retained, because now satisfaction is sought with true respect for the demands of reality.”

The only way to create a future riddled with moments of happiness and true love is by building an internal brick house.  No amount of money or business success will ever fix your inner voids, they will only mask them. If you are hopping from un-healthy- relationship to another than maybe it’s time to slow down and ask yourself; What material am I building my life out of?